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The Good, the Bad and the Ugly Scales

Bathroom Scale

I love my scale. I hate my scale. I LOVE  my scale. I HATE my scale.  Why is it that all of those fancy electronic scales give you different reading every time you step on them?  I discovered that if I lean forward on my scale, my weight shifts downward, however if I lean back on my heels one minute later, the pounds pile back on. I found the most consistent weight report would be to stand perfectly still, not breathing, head held high, with only my eyes permitted to glance down at the digital reading. Exhale.

Tired of hearing me complain about my fluctuating weight, my husband came home the other day proudly bearing me a gift. A brand new “Weight Watchers” scale! How romantic! This is what happens after you have been married for over 14 years.

I was psyched! Finally an accurate scale. This machine had all the bells and whistles. First it was very aesthetically pleasing. It was round instead of the usual square shape and was also very modern looking – all glass with silver accents. Another major feature was that and it could track weight loss/gain for up to four people. Cool.

After a frantic search for the proper batteries, the scale was placed in the bathroom for a test run.

Now as a rule, I NEVER step on the scale at the end of the day. After a day of gorging myself on low-carb goodies and drinking liters upon liters of water, etc. I know that my weight will always be considerably higher at the end of the day versus in the early morning, after my body has digested all of its intake.

My husband encouraged me to try a “test run”. I refused, saying “I’m not gonna step on that thing now. I’ll wait til tomorrow morning.”

“Come on!” he pleaded. “Try it out, I bought it for you.”, he added laying on the guilt.

 “No way, Jose,” I replied. “If you want to try it out so much, you go first. ”

“Fine!” he said in frustration and locked himself in the bathroom to measure his weight in privacy.

A few minutes later, he emerged and I asked brightly, “Soooooo, how is it?”

His response was less than enthusiastic. He said “Its fine, but I think it may be off by 2 pounds.”

“Two pounds higher, or two pounds lower” I asked.

“Higher”, he replied. “You try it and see. ”

Now under normal circumstances. I would have continued my refusal, however challenged with a brand new, expensive and perhaps faulty purchase, I reluctantly agreed.

I shuffled into the bathroom and locked the door after myself . I proceeded to strip off any heavy clothing that would have possibly increased my weight and gingerly stepped on the new scale. After my initial shock upon the new reading, I immediately hopped off. I repeated the same process with our old scale and lo and behold, there was a 2 pound differential. Our brand new, fancy, Weight Watchers scale was reporting an approximate weight gain of 2 whole pounds!!!

I quickly re-dressed and emerged from the bathroom deflated and disappointed. Did I really weigh as much as that new scale reported? Was it me…the old scale… or the new scale?

I did not have to agonize about it for too long. My husband quietly repackaged the new scale and stored it away – in the very back of our bedroom closet. I love my old scale. I love my husband! 🙂

Chow for now!

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